We Must "Feel the Way Others Feel"

“I learned that unless we feel the way others feel, we cannot be too effective in meeting their needs. I have often said we must feel another’s need before we can fill them. Sometimes we learn another’s language or culture and are able to feel the way they feel, but not always. Feelings go far beyond mere language or knowledge. To feel how others feel is a great blessing and is accomplished as we hurt with them, laugh with them, mourn with them, rejoice with them, cry with them, suffer with them, wonder with them, pray with them, experience miracles with them, and become reconciled to die with them if necessary." – John Groberg

I love this quote. Elder Groberg wrote it talking about his mission, but it applies to anyone who is trying to help other people, whether at church, work, or in your own personal life. One of the most important qualifications my line of work of direct social services is empathy for the clients (in my case, the homeless and low-income). Everytime I meet with a client I try to think of how I would like to be treated if I were in their same position.

I often get clients who get very upset for some reason or another, (especially if we cannot provide them a specific service they were seeking). They will yell, critize, and threaten. Whenever this happens and I feel like yelling right back at them or making a smart alec comment, I try to remember that I am seeing my clients at their worst. They are desperate for help and don't know where else to turn. When the day is over I will go home to my nice warm apartment that has plenty of food. I don't have to worry about how I am going to surive through the next month. My clients don't have the same luxery. When their day is over they will still be homeless or be worrying about their month-to-month survival. Hopefully we will be able to help them out of that situation, but immediate help, like food, only lasts so long and permanent change is far from instant.

I also try not to be overly judgmental. Yes, a lot of my clients have gotten where they are because of their own bad choices, but my job now is to help them, not to point out all their faults. There are other issues with homelessness that I will eventually write about, but the most important topic I feel is remembering to treat the homeless and low-income populations as people, people just like you and I. Put yourself in their shoes and try to understand them. After all, we are all children of God and equally important in his eyes.